42056 & 42305
Firstly, I spent the whole of my morning trying to decipher this tweet from Grant, who did explain that it was something about buying new spanners or something, but even now I think he was trying to get something past us.
And then in Carriage E, 42056, on the Penzance service home I was forced to share my seat with a bloke with terrible BO who spent the whole journey to Reading performing an extraordinary array of over-exaggerated yawns. I mean, I was getting the message, he’d had a hard day at work, but did he really have to share it with the whole carriage? We suffered a slight delay and as we pulled into Reading, the TM announced why we were running late which set Mr Attention Seeker off into another round of tuts, shrugs, sarcastic laughs and much head shaking. Unfortunately some women encouraged him by engaging him in conversation which gave him the ideal opportunity to launch into a bizarre anti-FGW tirade which all centred around the motto “Transforming Travel” – which, to my knowledge FGW have never used as a slogan anyway.
“Oh, Transforming Travel! Pah! Never in a million years. Transforming Travle, my left foot!” etc
Just as I was preparing to move I noticed an iPhone cable on the floor under the seat. I picked it up and asked Mr Transforming Travel if it was his.
“Oh, no it’s not mine,” he said as he took it and put it in his pocket, “I thought it was yours.”
Which means he was not only a thief but a selfish twat that wasn’t even going to ask me if I’d maybe dropped my cable. A selfish thieving twat. A selfish thieving smelly twat.
And in other news aboard the 18:37 to Frome, I read the tragic news whilst sitting in Carriage B, 42305, that FGW Twitter hero Leo is leaving the company. He was the only one who understood me!
Whaaaaaaaaaaaaah!
No comments:
Post a Comment